Now Playing Tracks

oceanashenue:

so today my ap art history teacher was teaching us about Hapshetsut the only female pharaoh and he was like “have you seen women they can pop out a baby and be like alright let’s go” and then he walked over to this guy and aimed his fist towards his balls and the guy flinched and held his crotch so he was like “men may be stronger but women are tougher” and then he said “so when someone tells you to grow a pair, they mean ovaries”

churchofsterek:

gallifreyslocked:

when i was in year 5, i did a speech on clumsiness for my school’s public speaking contest and to be clever, i tripped on my way to the stage dropping my note cards all over the place, but then i pulled the real ones out of my pocket saying ‘if you’re going to be clumsy, it pays to be prepared!’

everyone lost their shit and i got second place

If you got second place who got first… Did they talk about fire safety and burn the stage down or something

(Source: thewinterswidow)

semolavanpeltpan:

tithegirl:

shiips:

apolkadottedowl:

sasstrid-and-dorkcup:

madehimsaycomfychairs:

floacist:

iwishitwas1983:

I’m crying.

LMAOOOOOOOOO the screaming in the beginning

"mr. owl"
"oh jesus christ"
"please don’t give me that look"
"please don’t fly"

DYING omg

That owl is 30000000% done

every time this video graces me with its presence i feel obliged to reblog it

I would have loved to see his reaction if the owl had flown right back in the window.

The owl is so menacing omg

reblog forever because owls are both the best thing ever and beyond terrifying.

Hahahahaha!! I want 50 of them.

(Source: becausebirds)

jackanthonyfernandez:

carmelinaxox:

this is how gay people communicate 

Screaming

(Source: drinkdatkoolaid)

We make Tumblr themes